How to Use Nonviolent Communication in Your Relationships
Do you ever find yourself misunderstood in a disagreement? What do you think would happen if you and your partner actually felt closer after a disagreement, instead of further apart?
Most relationships would benefit from implementing nonviolent communication (NVC) into their relationship. NVC is not a technique to end disagreements.
Rather, it’s a communication tool that creates empathy and understanding between you and your partner.
By creating empathy and understanding, it can be easier to find solutions for everyone involved.
It’s not to say that violent communication happens because someone is bad; but rather, violent communication stems from habits taught to us from the past.
Practicing NVC can help you develop different, empathetic habits when you and your partner have a disagreement.
Nonviolent communication is based on the fundamental principle that humans have needs, and acknowledging those human needs can create a positive, more cooperative space.
Here are the four components of nonviolent communication to implement in your relationship:
1. Observation.
First, express your observation of the situation. Observations should be purely factual recounts, with no judgment involved.
Communicating an observation gives the other person an opportunity to understand your perspective.
Express what you saw or heard that triggered your emotions.
Separate your initial judgment from your observation! Focusing on facts only helps start the conversation in a way the other person is less likely to get defensive.
2. Feelings.
Next, name the way that observation makes you feel. Expressing your feelings and emotions may be difficult, but it’s necessary to describe and communicate how you feel.
This step gives you an opportunity to take responsibility for your feelings, acknowledging that others are not responsible for your feelings or what caused you to feel that way.
When someone names an emotion, validate their emotion without shaming or preventing them from feeling that way.
Examples of feelings to name include sad, angry, afraid, and surprised.
3. Needs.
Unmet needs are usually at the center of most conflict. Your feelings of anger or frustration may come up because of unmet needs, such as love, compassion, or acceptance.
After you name your feelings, identify what you need in order to feel better. What underlying desire do you want to be met?
Although it may be difficult, try communicating your needs as often as possible instead of expecting the other party to assume what your needs are.
When communicating your needs, try using “I” statements. Using “I” statements helps make the discussion less confrontational, and focuses on what you need.
Work with your partner towards fulfilling your needs, but also consider how you can meet your own needs.
4. Requests.
To resolve the conflict, make an explicit request or suggest a resolution. It’s important to name your emotions and needs before making a request!
Without communicating the context of how you feel and what you need, your request might sound like a demand.
Communicate your request clearly rather than dropping hints.
Remember, a request is different from a demand. Be ready to leave room for alternatives or compromise.
Frame your request in a positive way. Instead of saying, “I would like you to spend less time on your phone,” you could suggest, “I would like to spend more undistracted time together when we’re at home.”
The key to nonviolent communication is to practice empathy as you listen to someone else’s feelings and needs. Listen deeply and curiously, with the intent to honor the needs of the other person.
Essentially, listen to understand rather than listen to respond.
When you listen to your partner with the goal of understanding their perspective, your partner will feel understood and more comfortable to hear your perspective.
Practicing nonviolent communication regularly can be a transformative step to a thriving relationship.
How did you like this post? If you found this article helpful to you, you may want to share it with others by clicking the social networking buttons – Thank You!
Cheers, Helene Malmsio
Related Reading: How To Build Long Lasting Relationships - Free Online Self Help Guide
Discover Yourself With Gorgeous & Fun Guardian Angel GRATITUDE JOURNALS:
The full colour beautifully illustrated writing prompts in these Angel & fairy themed thankfulness diary sets make it easy and fun to write every day about the big and small joys in your life.
Stop taking your life for granted and attract even more abundance every day!
#GuardianAngel #Angel #thankful #gratitude #journal #diary #grateful #happiness #mindful #selfhelp #selfimprovement #selfgrowth #selfdiscovery #LawofAttraction #bodymindspirit
Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Relationships.
"Power Tips" magazine is back!
You Get A Free Complete Self Help Report delivered to your email box every edition, plus you get a free PLR article and other great gifts!
SUBSCRIBE BELOW ... I promise you will want to USE what you learn!
I really want to know what you think of this site, this page, and to hear your tips or suggestions about it.
So please share your story or simply add a Comment in the comment box.
If you feel that the information on this page has been useful to you please give it a Like or share it with your friends - thanks!!
"You are a life Saver!!
I recently discovered this site and I can tell you that my life has not been the same. I now come here EVERYDAY and spend at least 1 hour.
I used to spend that time browsing online fashion and beauty
magazine which just means that I spend more. Now I have replaced that
habit with coming here.
In future I will think about contributing articles as well. Thank you! Thank you!! Thank you!!! and God bless"
Contact Us | About Us | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | FAQ | Testimonials
Amazon and the Amazon logo are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Product prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time
indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability
information displayed on [relevant Amazon Site(s), as applicable] at the
time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.
"Power Tips" is back!
Free Complete Self Help Report inside every edition, plus free PLR article and other great gifts!
SUBSCRIBE BELOW ... I promise you will want to USE what you learn!
You can subscribe to my RSS feed to get updated whenever new content is added here!
Subscribe To This Site
